The Stories of Edith
by IncognitoSparkle
Summary: After being kicked out of villainy due to a failure, Edith tries to buy some time in a decisive interview for her sister's to get evidence to help her. Her plan is to tell stories. Whether they are true or not is not the point. Full summary inside!
1. Chapter 1: Screw up

**Full summary: Now fully grown up, Margo, Edith and Agnes follow in the footsteps of their adoptive father and become villains. However, when an unexpected screw-up in Edith's latest scheme gets her kicked out of the villain world, she arranges a meeting with the VC (Villain's Council) to try and get her status back. She recieves a text from her sisters saying they have fake evidence to help her out of her mess, but she needs to buy some time for them to get there. She does it by telling a story. Her story may or may not be true, but it works either way for Edith.**

**This'll be from Edith's point-of-view completely. Yeah, Edith is my favourite character!**

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><p><strong><span>Chapter 1: Screw-up<span>  
><strong>

_The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure._

This isn't going well.

This _really _isn't going well at all.

I silently stick to the wall, making sure I am avoiding the various traps scattered around. My intelligence – coming from my older sister – suggests there is even a _unicorn _trap. That'd be great against Agnes.

Damn, it is _quiet_ down here. Not that it should be noisy. An underground vault, locking away the greatest secrets and the precious money used by villains internationally. This isn't a place where you'd find a boyfriend, or go for a relaxing walk.

Margo likes relaxing walks. Oh, that reminds me. I need to check on her.

_Focus_, dammit! If I get caught, I'll be kicked out of the villain world. I'd be a disgrace to my family. I need to reach the vault before I worry about her. My father still sees all three of us at least twice a week. Coming and going from his house. It hasn't changed a bit outside, but inside it is now our dream home. The one we dreamed of when we were still orphans. I love him.

Oh! Focus focus _focus! _I'll be kicked out. Booted away.

I wouldn't go down without a fight, though.

"I have reached the target without any opposition," I say on my comm. Untraceable and in-audible to anyone I haven't selected to hear it, "Do you read me, sis, over?"

It takes a moment. _Poop._ If she doesn't hurry up, I'm going to get caught for sure, "Yeah, Edith. I do. But please! You can turn back."

I roll my eyes, but I quickly look back down from where I came. Almost completely dark to the eye, but my infrared has helped me pick out my target, "Not this again. Margo, I know you love me and all, but I can do this," I whisper, "Now, where are them codes?"

"Edith! I refuse to send them unless you tell me no-one is about to see you!"

I look around as if she can see me. I can just say no-one is here, but no. Old habit, I guess, "No, Margo. No-one is here but me. Unless you count this fly I have seen - "

"What? It could trigger the sensors!"

_Oh poop_. "I'm on it. Why don't you trust me?" I say, as I draw my miniature homing missile launcher. I invented the thing years ago, but it still sticks with me. Dad was proud, "I am a _professional._"

A small giggle, but then it stops abruptly, "You haven't changed much. Except you don't pout. You attack. Anyway, fire that missile of yours, sis."

As soon as she said fire, I got the lock-on buzz. I reduce my breathing and pull the trigger. A moment of nothing but darkness and my slow breathing, then small particles fly into the air, "Done. Now, the codes."

Margo must've pressed _transmit_ on her supercomputer. The faint sound of my moblie phone receiving a message confirms it, "It's funny. It matches _Mr. Stuff Crust_'s telephone number. Oh, and Dad has promised that if we pull this off, all of us get stuff crust pizza for the whole weekend at his house."

I laugh whilst I place the phone into the USB slot of the vault. Who uses USB slots on a vault? I am also laughing at Dad's promise. He either really likes pizza or has no faith at all in us. I guess he has finally realised he likes it, "Yeah! Get in!"

"Edith! Be quiet!"

Oh... oh... oh no no no _no no_. Not now! I can't get caught. "Oh, dammit!" The locks open silently to reveal hordes of cash – I estimate at least 30 billion dollars – and priceless global landmarks and treasures from villains gone-by, "Jackpot."

_**I didn't even notice the flaw I made. I regret it to this day, as it made everyone's lives more complicated, but it was a hell of an adventure! Better than any theme park.**_

I didn't scan for traps within the vault, and now I am captured. I don't even know how. A bright white light and then sudden darkness, as if a bag had been put over my head.

_**About five hours later, I was told my days as a villain were over. I managed to get an interview with the VC, in the hope of keeping myself in my chosen career.**_

"Edith, it'll be okay. Me and Margo and Dad will find a way! Dad always does!"

I look at my little sister and give her a sad smile. As right as she was about Dad – especially after he saved us from pyjama man – I don't think even _he_ can help me.

"Agnes, of course you will," I hug her, "But if the naughty people say no, will you be my successor?"

I'm 20 now. Margo is 22 and Agnes is 18. But I still treat her like the unicorn-loving sister I once knew. She still did like unicorns, just not as much as she used to, "Sure, Edith. But I'll make it a unicorn-stealing empire, you know that don't you?"

I can do this. I know that don't I?

"Yeah, I do."

She laughs, "I'm just warning you!"

Margo appears in the doorway, looking regretful. She wears new glasses now – designer, made to fit her and match her specs – and still with the green. I always have liked pink and purple. Agnes likes whatever colour her unicorns are. The kitchen hadn't changed from when we were kids, either, "Edith, I'll do whatever I can. I should have told you to check in the vault. I should have been there with you. I should have – "

"Margo, it isn't your fault," I say, holding up my hand for silence, "I could have been more careful, sis. Try and convince Dad to still let us do that weekend-thing for me. I'd do it, but I'm a bit angry, so violence is expected..."

"You'd never hit me again," said Dad, appearing behind Margo, "Even though I did ground you from everything, that was a good punch!" He laughs, "We'll work something out, kitten. I even pinky-promise!"

I wave goodbye.

I walk out of the door, not even grabbing my coat. All of my files and evidence is waiting for me in my car. The whole point of this is because I was caught whilst doing a scheme and because I was caught stealing from the villain's themselves.

I begin my drive to the VC building. Ironically, this is where the vault was located. My career breaker could be my career saver. A broken, abandoned-looking building. The kind you see in cheesy haunted house films; smashed windows, with lightning in the background. Okay, scratch the lightning bit, but it does look haunted.

I park my chrome-silver Nissan GTR Black Edition '12 – my pride and joy since I stole the prototype with Dad as a kid – outside the building, and take a deep breath. I know this will be a long, hard day.

All thanks to a screw up.

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><p><strong>Could you review, please? I am trying really hard to make this at least decent. Drop a comment, help me improve, motivate me!<strong>


	2. Chapter 2: The Way Legends Begin

**Chapter 2: The Way Legends Begin...**

_You never get a second chance to make a first impression._

"Welcome, Miss Edith. May I take your coat?"

The receptionist greets me in the usual fashion; slowly and without taking much noticed. _May I take your coat? _Seriously? Stupid kid. Poor girl joined up to try and get into the mainstream villain action. Instead she is just a low-life receptionist.

"No, but thanks anyway," I say, trying not to draw attention to her because I haven't _got_ a coat. I feel pity for her, "Which room am I in this time?"

She looks up, and notices what she has done wrong, "Oh... no coat... anyway, the usual room. B1."

_The usual_. My stomach knots. B1 basically means "Bad One" to me. All of my mess ups, all the times I've strayed too far from the villain code, I have ended up in that room, "For Pete's... okay... I'll go there now."

The building is eerily quiet. It is usually full of hopeful, young villains, trying to be accepted into the Council, with the occasional seasoned villain walking around doing whatever they did. I feel as if most people have left because of this moment; the make or break moment for me. I continue to jog down the various corridors until I reach "Bad One". I wait a moment, taking deep breaths. How the hell can I get out of this? My luck has ran out.

They could be out on a break...

I knock, and I hear a muffled, "Come in." Damn, they _are _in. I open the door slowly, an receive a few nods to sit down. I comply, and put my hands in my lap instead of on the table in front. The whole atmosphere is like an interrogation. It probably is one.

"So, Miss Edith," says the man on the other side of the table in a deep, authority-oozing voice. Everyone else is sitting around the table about a metre and a half away; a new layout I haven't yet seen, "What was the meaning of stealing from your own? And why did we catch you?"

"Well, it is a long story – " Just then, my phone goes off. "Sorry," I say, before reaching out to grab it out of my light blue jeans. My clothing style has changed a bit; Pink T-shirt, jeans, some trainers and a bracelet. I still wear pink beanies; every time I outgrew one, I'd buy the same style as my first, just a size bigger.

_Oh poop. _A text. I read it:

_From, Margo._

_We have some faked files to support your case. But we are in Africa. Don't ask. Stall or something._

Stall, eh? I'm good at that, "Yeah, it is a long story," I decide to use real events in my life and... change them a bit, "Want to hear it?"

An elderly man on one of the chairs sighs and looks at his watch, "As long as it keeps me away from the wife..."

All the others looked at each other, laughed for a moment, and said in unison, "Agreed."

I lean forward, using my hands to punctuate my words, "It started when I was a kid. When I was adopted by Gru..."

_**12 years earlier**_

Me and my sisters scream as we run down the hallways of our orphanage. _Adoption! _Everyone in the orphanage had heard; all three of us – me, Margo and Agnes – were going to get adopted _at the same time. _No-one – not even us three – thought that'd happen. I am so happy I am grinning more than I ever have!

A dream come true!

Margo helps Agnes pack her bag. I pack my own, shaking with joy.

"Aw. My caterpillar never turned into a butterfly," says Agnes. She is annoying, but I love her. I don't find her adorable like the many adults who come and go, trying to split us up, but she is my sister.

That doesn't stop me from saying in disapproval, "That's a cheeto."

Agnes looks at it, and then eats it. I feel like I'm about to gag, but I stop short. Bags packed, and ready to go! We rush to the lobby, screaming with excitement. I still can't believe it. It is a dream come true. Too good to be true, as Margo would say.

She was wrong.

The man in front of us is wearing a Spider-man suit, without a mask, and has a funny nose. I turn around, about to laugh, but Margo stops me. But even she is stifling the giggles. Agnes runs up to him and grabs his leg. "I got your leg. I got your leg!" she shouts in giddiness. I try to look serious.

Margo tries to re-gain her composure, "Uh... I'm Margo, this is Edith... and that is Agnes."

"And I'm Gru. You will help me do the greatest thing ever!" Gru says, hands behind his back, "You are all going to help me beat that guy named Vector..."

"Vector?" I ask, again struggling to prevent laughter. Funny names, too! Can this get better?

Miss Hattie is staring at this "Gru" in awe. I can feel my face muscles forming a grin, but I resist with all my will-power.

"He's a dentist!" Miss Hattie says. I don't believe her. How can this funny looking, light-hearted dude be a dentist?

And then he jumps into a massive tank car. Margo helps him get Agnes off his leg, whilst I find a comfortable spot in the My Little Pony furnished vehicle. It is a laugh a minute, this day. I put my bag down in my chosen territory and go to see what is happening.

Margo is bent double-over, laughing. Agnes is, too. I look up to see Gru looking embarresed. He mouths, "They don't like my style of car," at me. I begin laughing too, and his face turns red.

He orders pizza – at the request of Margo and Agnes – and it arrives within 30 minutes.

We eat in silence, not sure what we will be doing with him. Probably to steal the moon! That'd be awesome!

His house is nice, with lots of warfare decorations from all ages, and the occasional newspaper that had a picture of him smiling devilishly. I think I can grow to like my new Dad. He's like me in so many ways!

"Bedtime girls! Time for bed!" Gru says. Agnes moans at these words. "No, little girl. Now!"

_**12 years later**_

"Lies. Gru never wore a Spider-man suit!" said the man sitting at the table.

I laugh, "I am your only source of proof, sir."

One of the men nudges a woman next to him and says under his breath, "This is how legends are made; by mixed up stories with a little truth in them, and with a massive villain like Gru as a Dad and an already villain-like mindset."

But I hear it all. I smile, and continue, "So we grow to like him, but he gives us away. But it wasn't his fault. Uncle Nefario did it," I look down, as I remember all the negative emotions that I and my sisters experienced, but then I feel the happiness and joy – the infinite amount – that we experienced afterwards, "But then he trades the moon for us! How cool is that?"

"Stay formal, Edith!"

"Sorry. So he trades the moon for us with pyjama man – "

"Vector," one said like Gru did. I giggle slightly.

"Yeah, him. But Vector doesn't give us back. So he chases us through the sky, and tells us to jump. Me and Agnes land fine. Margo doesn't but Gru saves her! Cool?"

"Formal!"

"Sorry," I lean back in my seat, totally at ease in the "Bad One". I think of what I can say next, "So we settle down with him again, and he helps me and Margo invent – because by now we know he is a villain and not some Spider-man wannabe, and not Agnes because she was still too young – our first invention. Margo chose a pizza maker. I chose to create a miniature homing missile for taking out extremely small targets..."

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><p><strong>How are you liking it? Please review! Please! I'll even thank you publicly in the next chapter!<strong>


	3. Chapter 3: Surprise!

**Still no reviews, huh? Either everyone hates this, or all you are all lazy! Just drop a comment, peeps! It could be as simple as, "This is good" to "I hate this thing".**

**Also, these will be short, quick chapters until Margo, Agnes and Gru reach Edith. But I'll try and make them engaging. They all link, too!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 3: Surprise!<strong>

_Your intellect may be confused, but your emotions never lie to you._

_**Recap...**_

_Edith has arrived at the VC building. She is directed to the room B1 which she calls "Bad One" due to past experiences. When she starts the interview, she recieves a text from Margo informing her that she, Agnes and Gru have fake information and evidence to support her defence, but they are in Africa. To stall, she begins to tell stories. With some truth and lies added in to make them – in her eyes at least – more interesting. One was about the first day with Gru, and now she is talking about her first invention..._

_**12 years earlier**_

I sit next to my eldest sister – Margo – whilst playing tea-party in the main room. I can't sit with Agnes because she is completely engulfed in unicorn toys. I almost fainted when I saw Dad come home with all them toys, but not nearly as much as when I heard what he got me.

_A surprise_, he said. And his surprises had been _huge _so far. Like the theme park visit. Or the day he took us back for good. And the story he wrote! It was the same for Margo, too. _A surprise..._

Why he is doing all this I don't know. But, who can say no to free things?

So me and Margo are just sitting here, passing the time. I can't wait!

"Clink," I say, as my tea cup strikes Agnes's, "Clink," I say again, as it hits Margo's. After ten or eleven repeats, I finally get bored and try and make things interesting, "Hey, why don't we fill these up with that new thing Dad bought in?"

Margo looks at me with a painfully disproving stare, "You mean the thing that'll make you explode?"

I look back, and I say offensively, "Uncle Nefario said that to me once. I kicked him in the shin, causing _him_ to explode."

She frowns at me. Boy, is she in a weird mood today, "I just hope this surprise doesn't make you hyper."

"I don't care," says Agnes, "Edith is funny hyper!"

I turn red, "I am not! How about Margo? She isn't the angel everyone thinks she is when she is hyper!"

Margo stands up. I am immediately sorry, but I stand my ground. Margo towers over me, "Yeah. But at least I don't pout and _do _something about my problems unlike you!"

"Margo, Edith, stop! You're going to hurt each other," cries Agnes. We both ignore her. Hey, how hasn't Dad heard all of this?

"Sis, don't make me hurt you..."

"Girls? Margo, Edith? Come down to the lab," says Gru's voice over the houses intercom, "And stop fighting!"

So he had _heard _and _seen_ it all. That's my Dad. No... _our _Dad. He never lets us out of his sight now. Not since he promised us he would never let us go again. Me and Margo activate the secret entrance and quickly say, "See ya!" to Agnes. When we get to the lab, Dad is waiting for us. He directs us to a room, and says to wait their for him. He turns around and heads away.

"What do you think it is?" I ask.

"I don't know, Edith," says Margo, "But I'm sure it'll be great."

I begin to run, excitement overwhelming me. Margo walks. She never seems to run when Dad is _possibly_ watching. I don't know why.

I'll ask later.

The lab is as busy as ever. The minions are colliding, laughing and frantically doing work. I'm not entirely sure what they do. I look back and see Margo still walking.

I roll my eyes and continue my run. When I reach the room., I go inside without Margo. The room is just full of boxes and machines. Grey and black everywhere with some yellow goo on the walls; nothing pink or new or nice. "This is our surprise?" I whisper loudly.

Margo arrives with Dad a few seconds later, "Ah, Edith," Dad says, "Do you like it?"

I consider telling him the truth, but then realise it'd break his heart, "Yeah. But what is it all? What do them thingies do?"

Dad walks on, and I follow him with Margo next to me. She holds my hand; we do that to make up without saying anything. I smile slightly. Dad begins to talk, "This very room... is the room where I used to invent small-scale items. Take my Buzz Bomb, for example. Creates a loud buzz on impact," he pauses and suddenly turns around to face us. I think I know where this is going, "You can have it. To share."

I was right! I always wanted to invent like Dad! Even Margo is happy. We both hug him.

"I'll help you with your first invention. Margo, yours?"

She thinks for a moment, looking up at the ceiling with one foot ahead of the other, "Pizza maker. It makes them at a touch of a button. No ingredients needed."

"That's great! And you, Edith?"

I know exactly what I want, "Miniature Missile Launcher!" I scream.

"Good... wait... what?"

"You heard me," I laugh.

Dad thinks for a moment. He releases the hug, and begins his telling-off-face but stops short, "You can have target practice with blank rounds on the minions, then. Lets get to work..."

Margo smiles at me and nods as we begin to walk after Dad. Even she likes my idea!

_**12 years later**_

"I am once again questioning the truth in this. Your sister isn't – and wasn't – like that. Gru would never allow harm to happen to his minions."

I must have been here for an hour. Outside, people are walking home with their kids from school; oh, how I loathed them days! Pushing on through school was hard, especially when I was at the orphanage. Dad stopped the problems in the end. I was glad to be able to go to Villain College. The sun is moving closet to the horizon, and some of the older members of the Council are dozing off. Wait, why am I describing the world around me? I'm not Margo!

"Deal with it," I say, thinking of my next move, "Want to hear the next big step?"

I can feel the chairs getting closer to me. The council are literally on the edge of their seats for my story. I feel... happy and accepted for the first time in the VC, "Sure," one or two of them reply.

"This is a year later. Me and Dad go out to steal a car..."

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><p><strong>Notice the lack of detail in some places? I am telling a story in a story, and it is by Edith. What did you expect?<strong>

**Again, please review!**


	4. Chapter 4: Pea shooter

**Before I begin, I'd like to say thanks to StoriesAreMagic: Thanks! If you didn't get my PM, I said... I think you can work out what is true or not. But if you can't I'm going to tie them up at the end.**

**Okay, this one will be the third to last story from Edith before a large advancement happens...**

**And this one is the longest I have written so far, I draw things back to the film, and things get serious.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 4: Pea-shooter<strong>

_Make the lie big, make it simple, keep saying it, and eventually they will believe it._

_**Recap...**_

_**After telling a... pretty small lie about her first invention, Edith now goes into new territory for lying; her first big villainous act. Target: Nissan. Item: GTR Black Edition '12 Prototype. Help from: Gru and minions. And lots of laughs from Nefario's stupidity.**_

"Okay, Dad, but promise me I can keep it."

Dad keeps telling me that me and him are going to steal something. A car. I am only 9! Why would I want to steal a car, not be able to use it, _and then still give it away? _I could have some use to a one-of-a-kind car in the future – maybe make it into a stunt machine... maybe – but not now.

Dad scratches his chin as he walks into the kitchen. _8:00 am. _Breakfast time. I sit down, waiting for my dead guy shaped pancake. The house hadn't changed much yet; it still has all the features I saw when I first set foot in the house. It does have some new photos and other items me and my sisters think are normal.

But how could we know all that? Me and Agnes have been orphans for as long as we can remember, and Margo swears she only remembers our old car. Poop... inner turmoil again. Focus! First mission with Dad. I can't let Margo's be a success and mine a failure!

Anyway, Margo and Agnes walk in, dressed in their ballet gear. I – on the other hand – am dressed in a stealth suit, like one I saw in a game once. Battlefield 3? Something like that. They laugh at me, but when they turn their backs to ask Dad about when they were going, I stick my tongue out. Old times... good times. But not as good as the times now.

"Yes girls... in about half an hour. Pancakes are nearly done... no, Agnes, Nefario is taking you... yes Margo, I'll pick you up..." Dad flips a pancake high into the air, spins, and then catches it in the pan. He then lobs it at my plate, which I am holding above my head with a smile on my face. It lands, and he turns to Margo and Agnes again, "What shape do you two want?"

Margo does her thinking act again, one foot in front of the other, looking up, but this time only briefly, "Butterfly."

"Unicorn!" Agnes screams without hesitation.

I sigh. Will she ever grow out of unicorns? Then again, will I ever grow out of carnage? I hope not. BOOM! BANG! STUNTS! JUMPING! My life! _Woohoo_! Can it get any better than having a villain for a Dad whilst liking everything I just thought of in my mind? Whoa, I really am smarter than I look. I think...

Margo clicks her fingers in front of me, "Edith, snap out of it!"

I blink a few times, "It's okay, sis. Just thinking ahead," I say, lying.

"Will you keep the car?" asks Agnes through a mouthful of pancake, "Because if you don't, I'll get Dad to make it unicorn-style."

_Keep dreaming, sis, _"Dad hasn't answered yet. Can I Dad? It'll be so cool owning a car at 9 years old!"

He turns to the table, handing me a juice carton when he gets there, "I suppose so. _But _you must promise not to drive it until we get you a villain license."

I put my little finger forward, and he grips it with his, "I promise, Dad." We all finish our breakfast in silence, and then Nefario arrives in a ballet suit.

Dad does a face palm! "Nefario... you are _taking_ _them _to dance class. You aren't actually going to dance. Why, why are you so old?" We all laugh, but Nefario just scratches his _really _bald head. It is brighter than the sun!

"Oh... uh... I was actually wondering why... under what circumstances... would I have to do dance class with them?"

"None," I butt in, like usual, "But I can't stop laughing!" I begin drinking from my juice.

Without warning, Nefario fires his _Box-Puncher 2000 _at my juice. It pokes a hole in it. I look at him, pouting, "You poked a hole in my juice box!"

"It is for your own good, girl," he looks back at Dad – who realises it is a repeat of my first day with him, and looks down for a moment – so I begin to move towards Nefario, "Now, Gru, we... uh... have a minion situation – " I kick him in the shin, and he shouts whilst gripping it, "Again? Really?"

I giggle under my breath, "Yeah."

Dad laughs, and then gets up, "That's my girl. It can wait, Nefario," turns to us, "Time to go!"

We move out of the kitchen, just talking about anything. Dad has hired a car for Nefario, and I jump into the back seats of the MLP tank car. It still makes me laugh, but I accept him as a Dad now, so I try to respect him a little more.

Even Margo accepts him.

Dad climbs up to his seat, and pushes the thingie to activate flying mode. I love flying.

"Edith," he says, turning his head slightly, "Ready?"

"More than ever, Dad," I say, looking into what some call 'space', when really it is just a wall, "Can't you just hyperfly out of here?"

Dad's face looks as if he wasn't considering what I said. A devilish grin forms on his face, and before I can say, "Whoa!" we are in Japan, the location of Nissan's HQ. The city now below is admirable. Skyscrapers everywhere, with tons of traffic below us, beeping their horns. But nothing beats the thrill of inventing. I just hope stealing matches up to that.

It will. Dad said so. And I trust him as much as Margo or Agnes.

"Nefario!" Dad shouts.

"Yes, Gru? The girls are giving me some trouble, and – "

"We are in sight of the target now. Is the plan ready?" Dad didn't give Uncle Nefario any time to finish, "Come on. Speak!"

"Oh... uh... yes. Transmitting now," I hear a loud _bleep _whilst Uncle says, "It should be simple. But... these girls of yours _aren't_!"

Dad laughs. He loves us now, and I am all the more happy for it. We have a _Dad_. "I got used to it. You should, too. I might make you do this more often," he looks back at me, grinning. I start to grin now, "Okay. We will be off the comm now for an hour or so."

He closes the link, and we fly without trouble. But then...

_BOOM! CLATTER! TINKLE!_

I get pushed around the ship, my constant stream of falls being broken by the My Little Pony items. They are hard though, but not as hard as the floor. I look up, and see Dad struggling at the controls, and I feel distant. That quickly turns into anger, though, and I have this sudden rage to kick and punch and kick and bite everything I see. "What is happening?"

Still struggling at the controls, Dad replies, "The ship didn't register a building on the scanner. We have gone clean through the top floor!"

What? "What do you mean, _it didn't register_?" The ship begins to go down, but it seems no-one can see us. Invisibility, probably. I still don't know everything on the ship.

"I don't know!" Dad is still struggling with the controls. Three... two... one... I brace myself for impact. "Oh, boy..."

Darkness.

_**Present day**_

"Wait... you _crashed _into a building. Was it the VC of Japan by any chance?" Henry – the man at the table – asks.

I look down and sigh, "Yeah, it was. Can I continue, please?"

One of the older ones look up, "You aren't dead?"

"How can I be dead 11 years ago if I am here right now?" I say, drumming my fingers on the table in frustration, "I don't _always _lie. Anyway, so we crash. Guess where? At the target. We begin to break in, but someone finds us. We steal the car fine, I guess, but Dad radios Nefario... I need to know when you'll arrive. He says ten minutes... we'll be there in ten minutes..."

_**11 years ago**_

"Edith, cut into that there. Paul, keep transmitting the signal."

Paul – a minion – makes a noise I can't fully understand. I think he said, "Yes, boss," but I'm not sure.

I begin to cut my way through the steel. Dad had done a great improvisation with this new invention: A few battery's, a chainsaw, his freeze ray, one rubber band and a lot of tweaks later, he had created an amazing cutter in five minutes – under stress. I would say loudly that he had done great, but it has taken us ages to get into the vents.

"Yes, Dad," the laughter and wisecracks have stopped. This is for real, "Almost done..."

I finish the massive circle I had to cut, and I prod it with my little finger. It falls like it wasn't even there. I let out a small laugh of victory. I climb through to see a spotlight shining in my eyes.

"Paul, Edith, get in here!" Dad shouts from the car we stole.

The light moves away, and I see it is a police helicopter armed with a pea-shooter. No, really, an actual _pea-shooter._ Not a weak gun. But it is scary to have a million peas land around you when you are nine years old. I run to the car and see Dad gripping the wheel with Paul shivering in a back seat. I dive into the other front seat, my beanie nearly falling off – I am wearing it with the spy gear! – and click my belt on. Dad drives away as soon as I straighten up.

This is going to be a chase, I know it.

But the adrenaline is amazing! I love stealing more than stunts and splashing in puddles! And even mud pies!

The helicopter continues to fire peas at us, whilst Dad hands me a radio, "Call Nefario!"

I do, "Uncle Nefario! Where the heck are you?"

"Behind the helicopter. I admire a country who uses peas in guns. I might make something like that one day – "

I cut him short, getting angry with his constant rambling, "Get here!"

Dad drives more and more violently, but the car still handles perfectly. Nissan have outdone themselves. As we approach a banked-corner – Margo told me it means a corner which makes the car 'incline' _what does that mean _towards the inner part of the turn – a bigger version of Dad's car descends in front of us. The back opens to reveal a large cargo space.

"Gru, get in here!"

"Keep steady!"

"Dad, you can do it!"

"Come on, Dad!"

"Ten metres, Gru!"

Dad accelerates and I hear a gentle tap noise. I then hear a mechanism engage, and darkness falls upon us. Relief fills me.

I turn my head slowly to Dad, and we say at the same time, "We did it!"

_**Present day**_

"I believe this one a little more."

I hold my hands up in mock helplessness, "I would never lie to you, _sir_," I hiss, "Why does everyone think I lie? I don't!"

Someone gets up and walks towards me, "So, then, you were nine during that story. What happened when you were twelve?"

I look up in confusion, re-adjusting my pink hat so it sits over my eyes slightly, "Twelve?"

The man scratches his long beard, "Twelve is the age where you are placed into villain school... usually. Did this happen?"

The memories come back to me, "Oh yes! That was fun." I think of a good story to mess with. When I nearly destroyed the building... when I mutated a hen... when I skateboarded on the roofs... oh, yeah! "Once, I decided to get revenge on a really horrible teacher..."


	5. Chapter 5: Murderer

**I had a brief moment of motivation for this, and so I wrote this in a day whilst it was still alive.**

**Things get serious now. I mean, _really _serious. Not everything is part of a dream world for the Gru family.**

**I also have done a chapter re-name.**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 5: Murderer<strong>

_Discontent is the first step in the progress of a man or a nation._

"Class, today we are going to learn about stealth. A stealth kit has been provided and is under your desks."

I look at my teacher with much interest; did she really just say _stealth_? Oh, wait... that'll mean we will have to steal a walnut from someone's pack-lunch box, knowing this idiot of a teacher.

Despite her reputation, though, one of my friends says, "Cool." Her name is Abby, and I know I'll have to teach her some remembrance skills one day.

Luckily for Abby, she is at the back of the classroom. I have only just took notice of the layout: 3 rows of 5 seats. I am at the front, sitting in the left-hand row. Our class is for the "deviant" students, otherwise known as "the ones that are too free-thinking for anyone's liking", which explains why it is the smallest, totalling just 15 students when everyone is present. Many people do independent lessons, which were usually better than these ones.

And the lack of people is perfect.

"Go to the changing rooms, get ready, and class 7Y will give you a briefing."

The teacher – Miss Sweeny – taps the blackboard. On it, a word that says BEGIN is written in block capitals. She does that when she can't be bothered to try and teach us, but because of the word _stealth_, everyone is eerily quiet. Really? Am I the only one that can see past the cover story? Man, everyone is _thick_. That's what Dad called a zombified Vector when he came after us. He told us that it meant _stupid._ I say it a lot now.

Heh, that day was more funny than scary. Margo said I was strange.

Oh, yeah, 7Y is Margo's class. Maybe she'll give me a harder mission. Hang on... Margo + Stealth Possibility's = Stealing a walnut. Poop...

Oh, where is everyone?

I run out of the door, almost forgetting the stealth box, and catch up to the others. Someone who shows interest in me – a guy named David – nudges me. I don't like him much, so I tend to ignore him.

"This'll be fun, eh? Hey, if it is a team mission, can I be part of yours?" I roll my eyes, and he notices. "C'mon, it'll be a laugh. You do know my dad is Dr. Evil, right?"

Just as I turn for the girls' changing room, I look at him, eyes blazing, "Yeah, but mine is _Gru_."

Everyone seems to flinch when I mention my father's name. Yes, I see Gru as my true father now. I never think about my birth parents anymore. I realised about two days ago the black car I kept seeing in my dreams with a teddy bear in it was my mothers. It always does a demonic laugh each time I get close, and flies up before disappearing. I remember now.

"Yeah, sure, Edith. Whatever you say."

Everyone is silent whilst we get changed, and even during the walk to 7Y. When we arrive, Margo greets us, "Ah, so this is 6H. Come inside, and we'll get you sorted," she turns, but notices my beanie still firmly above my head. It isn't stealthy, I know, but I can't let go of it yet. She mutters, "Yeah... _stealthy _Edith."

We pile in, and see only two other people. I recognize them as Bill and Lauren. They are leaning on two desks, jotting down notes. Margo calls to them in the longest speech ever!

"Bill, Lauren! New intake arriving! A... ten... _shun!_" They stand to attention. Not even Margo would do this, so I put it down to it being an assessment of leadership.

"Now, you may be wondering who these people are. Their past doesn't matter, or who they are. For all you know, they are as much of an ally as me or your parents. We will be working with them until further notice, and so get to know them, and brief them on objectives you deem suitable for their chosen squads."

My mind is drifting by now. I look out of the window and wonder how I'd react if Gru came crashing in with a freeze ray and my missile launcher. I miss the rest of the speech... and beyond.

"Edith! Miss Gru! Miss Edith Gru! Listen, you little muppet!"

I look up and see Mrs Johnson looking down at me. Without thinking, I say, "Shut it!" I look back out of the window.

"That's it! Detention! No... even better. You miss your chosen assignment of..." I look up again to see her looking at Margo. She nods, then finishes with, "Stealing the test results of the school!"

_**Present day**_

"I'll skip to the revenge part, shall I?" I say.

One of them looks at me with a sad expression, "This one isn't funny, is it? You are being serious."

"I aged. I changed. A lot more than I like..." I stopped short of mentioning that fateful night where my life changed forever. It happened after the revenge, but I still regret my actions. I look at my hands; the scars are forever present. Everyone tries to forget, but at night, when I close my eyes, I see it all over again, "Can I move on?"

Yes, all of these events have some truth in them. I am removing the boring parts, as well as the terrible parts. They all document my journey to two events; one being the robbery of the vault, the other being the night of Protocol 115X, also known as Operation Run Of Thunder.

One of the Council readjusts his seating position and says, "Go ahead."

Where the heck is Margo? "I need her now!" I say aloud.

"Edith, are you okay?"

I can't control myself. My arms feel like someone else's, and my mouth wont shut up, "No! No no no! Not now!" I see it all over again; the pain, the misery. The loss of hope, the discontent. "Step away from us! It's my fault!"

"Dave, inject her."

Everything goes black.

I awake in the chair, and everyone is looking at me. "Lets get down to business," says one of them, "Tell us about the illusion you were having."

Reluctant, I say, "No."

"Do it, or you are removed from our world right now. No exceptions, no rule bending, no _working from the sidelines_."

I need this job, so I begin, "Okay. I was sixteen, and someone didn't like us that much. One of our past scams had attracted some unwanted attention. Gru, Agnes, Margo and I had to defend our house. But we lost contact with Margo. Gru activates panel 115, and selects Protocol 115X. It... it..." I trail off, struggling and sweating, "It gassed the house, except from the lab. We thought Margo had evacuated but no... she was in the house. I was the one... who found her..." I cry, "And I could've stopped Dad. I was a grown girl then..."

Over my sobs, someone says, "But how is she alive now?"

I swiftly turn my head, getting angry, "Because my family is the smartest and most skilled _ever_. We revived her through a complex healing process. We first froze her body to preserve it, and then we replaced the destroyed organs. The lungs, heart and some veins and artery's were replaced. A mixture that _I _created was then administered into her brain and heart, which made them work again. And that's it."

"I assume she knows."

"NO!" I scream, "SHE DOESN'T! That is why it is so painful. She thinks it was a dream, and she'll die not knowing she already had!" I let my head fall onto the table, "She deserves better for helping me through _every problem life threw at me_! Not even Dad has done as much as Margo has for me!" I make my voice even louder, "I let her die! I know I did. _It was me! _I initiated Protocol 115X! _Okay?_ I didn't double check to see if she was still up there, did I? I did not! I didn't stop and think, _Hey, we can win this, _did I? No! How can you love a _monster _like me? And after I touched my potion... I hear voices! They are in my head, and they _never _leave me! They taunt me, saying I am a murderer! And I am! They are right! Just because she is alive doesn't mean I ain't, does it?"

"Is... is this true, sis?" says Margo's voice.

I turn around sharply. There she is, standing at the door, looking upset and betrayed, "Yeah... yeah it is." Well, I have nothing to hide now. "It is..."

* * *

><p><strong>I had a sudden idea whilst playing Gran Turismo 5. I got angry at myself for not pitting in, which lost me a four hour endurance race. So I altered the intended story-line a bit, using my own anger. I just made it a little bit more intense for Edith. Well, a lot, actually, but...<strong>


	6. Chapter 6: Underlying Problems

**This _was _going to have a poem I made in it, but I decided to use a real-life song...**

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><p><strong>Chapter 6: Underlying Problems<strong>

_To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that prisoner was you._

"Why, sis? Why didn't you think to tell me?"

Margo was upset, not angry. And the business between me and the VC was over; the evidence has cleared my name, and I am now the internal story teller. That didn't make up for breaking Margo's heart, though.

"Because it felt cruel," I say. "And Dad wanted you to... die again happy."

"Is it not cruel to not _tell me?_ Edith, _sister_, was it really you who found me?"

"Yes," I say absently. "You were over there." I point at the entrance to the kitchen. "You had been dead for two hours when I found you. And I swear to this day you said 'I love you' when I was crying over your body." I am starting to get emotional. That day has caused lasting scars on me. "I am also the one who invented the potion to help you live. But now I hear voices."

"So do I."

"Must be a side-effect. Mine tell me I am a murderer, but one always says 'Beautiful Area In Liberty' or something like that."

She raises an eyebrow, but doesn't comment on that. Instead, she decides to talk about the incident more, "They say to trust nobody. So it wasn't a dream, then? Mr Bob did come after us."

"Yeah. You were a good fighter. We all were, but he had too many men. And we didn't want to risk anyone's lives. And, well... I activated the emergency protocol without anyone's consent." I draw an imaginary in the air control panel with my finger. "Protocol 115X."

I get up from the alligator sofa and walk towards our room. Margo reaches out to stop me, but I say over my shoulder, "I'm getting something sis. I wont be a minute." I continue to walk, and I hear Agnes enter the room. I quicken my pace; she is with Dad on the matter of Margo finding out. And Dad is_ angry_.

I hope my gift will make up for it.

I crawl underneath my bomb bed – I had Dad make a new one out of a larger missile for my 13 birthday to last me forever – and turn on my torch. Years of undernourishment as kids has caused all of us to be smaller and thinner than we should be. The light coming from my watch was shone back in my eyes by my gift.

It was a small film I had made for Margo for helping me for all of these years. Encased in a silver metallic, bullet-proof case, the film is completely dedicated to me and her. Agnes had made on for me and Margo, and I have given Agnes hers.

Actually, I didn't make the whole thing myself. Her boyfriend and now husband – Lee – helped. Margo is lucky to have someone. My relationships don't work.

Focus! Wait... I don't care now. I have to admit it. I fail at love. Anyway, I don't mind Lee. He is like me in some ways, but like Margo in most. And they met through danger, only strengthening their bond.

I wonder why I haven't given Margo her clip yet. Well, she'll get it now.

I walk back in, and take off my beanie. No one has seen it off in years. Dad – who is now comforting Margo, looks at me with full-on surprise – whilst my sisters just look mildly surprised. When I did that, I told them it could mean two things: one is that I am leaving forever, the other meaning that what I am about to do is important and comes from my heart.

I walk up to Margo and carefully place the case next on her lap. "Open it on Tuesday," I say. Tuesday is three days away. "And then phone the number at the end of the clip. Oh, tell Lee about it. In fact, go to him and open it together."

And with that – no room for _thank you _or _goodbye_ or _what? – _I leave the house.

I get into my Nissan. Why don't I buy a better car? Sure, the GTR is good, but that new Pagani Hyendhfjd looks good.

The night-time lights around me are soothing. All the blur as I drive at 100MPH down the road, as if I was racing, reminds me of the carefree days. I miss them, but I wouldn't trade now for anything. _Actually, _I would, because my family doesn't really trust me. My life has been one hell of a ride, and a massive battle... lightbulb! I have an idea!

I am going to tell my kids – and I will find someone, no doubt, or I'll adopt, because I have been an orphan and they all deserve better – all about this. And, just to help me remember, I'm going to document it somewhere special and private. It might help with emotional release, too.

_**My Private Journal, Tuesday**_

Well then... the big day for Margo. Opening day. And a big day for me; I have a journal now.

That gift better had please her. I used my brain for once. And... maybe she'd hate me less. I didn't even get my hat back; if she hates the gift, then I never wear that one again. I'll go ask that homeless girl if I can buy hers for $100 if Margo doesn't like it.

And yes, I mean it.

I have a copy myself – just in case – and I watched it. I cried, I'll admit it. And the part Lee created... I wish I could sing this to someone:

_The city's beautiful,  
>in the early morning air,<br>love the smell of sunrise,  
>and everything becomes so clear.<em>

I wish that time would stand still,  
>if this was a part of a film,<br>we would watch the clip all day,  
>like a portrait of you and I,<br>like a portrait of you and I.

The city's beautiful,  
>feeling it in the early morning air,<br>love the smell of sunrise,  
>everything becomes so clear.<p>

I think you are beautiful,  
>and you know it by one look,<br>did you long for summertime  
>when you were growing up?<p>

Damn, I _am _jealous of Margo, ain't I?

We'll all find out tomorrow whether my life gets better or worse.

_**Wednesday**_

"Did you like it, sis?" I ask.

Margo stares at me, as if struggling to say something. We are standing outside Lee's house, which is on the outskirts of town. A nice green front yard greets people, but right now it makes me feel ill. I swear, if she doesn't like it...

"Well, I-I like Lee's part," she says, stuttering, "I'm sorry... I am. I can't forgive you. So-so I can't feel happy. But I know that if I was happy I'd love-love it."

I look down, knowing I'll be wearing a dirty, grey, ugly beanie from now on, "Yeah, I understand." I walk away from the driveway and back to my car.

What the heck can I do now? I hate myself, Margo doesn't trust me, Agnes and Dad think I am weak under pressure now. And I'm scared of being lonely. I don't know which is worse. I'm dangerous now. I'll probably hurt anyone who crosses me the wrong way. I drive home, singing...

_I think you are beautiful,  
>and you know it by one look,<br>did you long for summertime  
>when you were growing up?<em>

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><p><strong>Interest in that song? It is called Just One Second by London Elektricity, and I prefer the Apex remix. I heard about it on Gran Turismo 5, and I loved it! Give it a listen!<strong>


	7. Chapter 7: A Breeze

**Chapter 7: A Breeze**

_Honest hearts produce honest actions._

No-one can lie forever, no-one can live a lie, and no-one can lie about love.

That is the only thing I remember of that day at school. The one where we were lectured on moral values. About 6 years ago. Wow, talk about not paying attention...

I look at the mirror in mine and my sisters shared room at Dad's house. The reflection is not of me, but of someone lost, angry, sad, betrayed, regretful, and most of all; hurt. See? I _can _be smart when I want to be. It is just wanting to that is hard. Which is why I "failed" in normal school, and passed with _flying colours _in villain school. Says a lot.

I don't bother with make-up, unlike my sisters, so I just use the mirror for getting my clothes looking _right._ Right – as in scruffy. I do it anyway, without this stinking old beanie on my head. It just adds to the image of _I hate myself, leave me alone._

I still don't fully understand why. Sure, I get the base of the problem. But I don't even want to be a villain anymore, which isn't a good sign, says Dad. I don't see much of him now. It has been... what... a _year _since all of them problems with the VC. Agnes still talks to me, just a little bit frosty-icy cold. Dad is every so often. Margo... Margo hasn't spoken to me for a year.

It isn't fair. Life generally isn't.

And it isn't just _not fair _to me. It is to Margo, too. She had sent me a message saying, "Hi... uh... sis. Do you want to... forget it...". She probably misses me as much as I miss her, and maybe more. Agnes needs her, too. She is like a moral compass for us.

_Was._ She isn't here now. Her absence is like a black hole. Okay, I'll admit it; I need to cut down on this wisdom and riddle and smartness thing.

I turn the metallic handle and leave my room, half expecting Margo to shout at me for taking to long with a knowing smile on her face. I almost cry when I hear and see nothing.

"Ah, Edith. I need you in the lab," says Dad, walking up behind me. "Agnes is already waiting."

I decide to act icy today. I am not in the mood for anything fun, "What about breakfast?"

"It can wait. Now, go!"

I roll my eyes discreetly and turn on the lab entrance. It hadn't changed since I had been adopted, so life falls into a rhythm. Except there is no Margo.

The tube quickly delivers me to the lab. Once it made me throw up; now, it is actually soothing and allows time to think. When I arrive, Agnes looks impatient.

"Edith, what took you so long! You got me scared for you!"

I look over my shoulder and see Dad arriving, "I'll tell you later."

Agnes has about ten seconds to say what she wants to. She spends five looking into my eyes. "It's Margo, right?"

"I wish I never taught you how to read people," I say jokingly, but she is right. "I'll tell you later, okay? But I can not be blamed for any injury to you or me."

Dad appears, "Problem?"

Agnes beats me to the finish line of opening-mouths, "No, Dad. What is it?"

"Your sister," he says, looking exhausted and overhwelmed with joy of some sorts. "Has sent us something. It has her logo on it, but I need all of us – me, you two, Nefario and the minions – to crack the encryption without corrupting the data. Okay?" I nod. I don't dare look at Agnes. "Good."

So, we begin this decryption thingy. _Give me a job I can enjoy, a large motive, and some decent instructions, and I'm your girl. _That was my villainous activities selling point. I worked as a part-time mercenary villain. If that is possible. After three hours of coffee, milshake, pizza and sweat later, the encryption is cracked to reveal a video clip, with an unknown length

"Play it," says Dad.

I do so, and a very simple message appears straight away, shocking me: FOR EDITH ONLY. ANYONE ELSE IS TO LEAVE NOW.

I look at Dad, who looks blank. He silently gestures to the adjoining room – I'm being smart again – and everyone leaves, leaving just me and the clip.

It plays.

"Edith..."

I carry on watching, but it is a blank screen.

"Edith, sister, can you hear me?"

I carry on watching.

"Edith! Listen! Say something!"

It takes another moment for the reality to sink in. _Oh_. "Uh..."

"Even you can do better than that!" Now an image appears. It looks like a webcam. _Real time._ Margo was streaming all of this. "You look... terrible, to be honest."

"I promised myself I wouldn't wear my good beanie until you forgave me," I say, tears forming. "And that I'd wear a really bad one. Because I took off my beanie when I gave you the clip... I had to."

She cries, "I'm sorry." The screen goes blank, and I can hear static.

Life isn't a breeze, and wounds don't heal quickly. A sudden anger overcomes my carefully constructed barrier between too much emotion and just enough to live. And I break.

"That's it!" I scream, not that anyone can here anyway. The lab is pretty much soundproof, except for some floor-boards in older parts creaking. "No more lies! _I am in love with someone!_"

No-one can lie forever, no-one can live a lie, and _no-one can lie about love_.

_**The end**_

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><p><strong>Wow. Not many people reviewed (Just StoriesAreMagic, who I am deeply thankful to) but I reached over 150 hits during the writing of this. Which is a lot more than I thought I'd get for a first fanfic. Thanks guys!<strong>


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